something struck me over the weekend in chicago...

do people resist change? that's the ultimate question. do i myself resist change? i think so, especially the change involves my "comfort zone." i don't think too many people like to leave their comfort zone, and i am just one of them. i've been trying very hard to change myself, my "anti-socialness" and "introvertedness." my "anti-socialness" depends on the time of the day and the day of the week and my school schedule. for those who know me, i don't talk too much when i have things (like homework) on my mind. at those times, i like to be alone by myself, doing my stuff and finishing them, which will bring me the outmost happiness. i cannot have fun while i have homework and schoolwork hanging there unless i finish them and get them done with. to say that i am an introvert may be a little extreme, because i am not really an introvert...well then, it also depends on whom i am with. there are a certain people that i feel most comfortable when i am with them, then i'll talk a lot, very open and nonstop sometimes. there are also a certain people that i feel less comfortable being with, and therefore, i talk less and become the observer. it takes a long time for me to feel comfortable with people, too... it takes years for me, usually at least a couple of years or more. i was different when i was younger, but something changed for the better or the worse. so now, this is me... of course i know my original characteristics are still within me, except that i don't show them right in front of people's faces. perhaps, this is my way of self-defense. maybe i am just a porcupine with spikes on my back all the time, maybe invisible, but they are there... however, if you find the right place to poke, then the spikes are useless and the porcupine is "defeated"... and just an additional note, i am trying to make myself more open although it is coming really slowly...i am A LOT better than when i was in high school.

be observative...that's what dad always tells...and you'll find out a lot more about the person you are talking to.

other than that...i hope i am not getting a food allergy which i think i have right now...maybe it'll go away in a few days. finger crossed. i'll eat really plain for the next couple of days. no milk, no egg, no cheese...just plain food probably bread and vegetables...