last night, i talked to him for probably 10 minutes, or maybe even shorter, and I began to doze off in bed... I vaguely remember our last "conversation"...or rather the question he asked me, "why do you love me?" I don't think I got a chance to answer him, because the next thing I know, I was trying to find my phone at 6:30AM in the morning... I found it stuck between the wall and my bed. One of these days, I will snap the phone in half while sleeping or get tangled by the wire that recharges my phone.

It must be very hard for him. I wonder if he feels neglected, frustrated, or disappointed (or none of the above but something else, or all of the above combined plus something else) when I fall asleep on him.

Why do I love him? How do I know if it is love or lust or purely friendship, especially since he's the only guy that I have dated in my life?

I guess it depends on how you define "love"... I think it changes form over the course of time, and it just gets richer and richer as time passes. It is really hard to describe what it feels like. Thinking about the person makes me happy and brightens up my days. I love the way he treats me and makes me feel that I am very special and important in his life. He makes me look at life from a more positive perspective, and he makes me smile and laugh. He makes me feel comfortable to be who I really am, and I know that I don't need to feel ashamed to express my emotions in front of him. I love the way he values my opinions and shares his inner thoughts with me. I love how we dream and plan for the future together... I love him for his considerate and understanding nature, especially when I get stressed or swamped by school-related work... Even though he's far far away, he still encourages and supports me to the best of his ability. How can I not love him for what he's done for me? I simply can't. I don't think I can find anybody else who can accept me the way I am...especially knowing that I can be kind of weird and moody at times. How does he put up with me? He must really love me to be doing all these, sacrificing other opportunities, time and energy... and be okay with me falling asleep on him on the phone... I am just so lucky to have him in my life... Life would be so much duller without him around.

I really have to commend him for his persistence and his unconditional love for me, assuming of course that he did everything for me from the bottom of his heart. It's amazing how our relationship is still staying strong despite of the distance and the stress in our lives... I certainly hope that things continue this way until the very end... and I shall predict that it will... :)