POLITICS...

no wonder they say that the Chinese people are like a plate of sand scattered all over the place. there is absolutely nothing i can do to save it. and i am too tired of being in between 2 women who hate one another and accusing one another. I don't see any point... I am tired. I want to quit. How am i going to be able to focus in studying today with this in the back of my mind haunting me like no others. I feel like it is all my fault that I have made the situation impossible to work with. How forgiving can people be? NOT too much in this case... I want to hide and just get away from everything around me.

life is full of variables... everything is inter-connected. One thing goes down, and the rest collapses. it can happen in a matter of 2 hours. Boom... nothingness. nothing will happen, and nothing will ever happen again. You can be "friends" for 2 days, then BOOM you are "enemies." Past history, past misunderstanding, and past mistrust are brought to the current generation, most of whom have not a clue as to why these rivalries are there. They probably don't care either.

when a middle person comes in and win the trust of party 1, they decide to work on a project together with the help of, perhaps, party 2. the middle person did something wrong that enraged party 1 (and the something has to do with a stupid little advertisement flyer!), and party 2 becomes the peanut butter between the toasts and keeps doing what it thinks is right. the timing was also pretty great that party 1 and party 2 were under the same roof. so the angry party 1 plus the mistrust/misunderstanding from the past about party 2 turned its focus to party 2, and a spectacular drama starts.

i don't know what to do... i thought i had it figured out, but i don't. now i feel like the one who is being played around. why would i even bother to get myself in this kind of position? why couldn't i have foreseen what was to come? i feel absolutely helpless and hopeless... I feel stupid... i am such a baaaaaaaaaaad "leader". I can't even make anything right. nothing that comes to my hand will work. there is this weight on me and it will not be lifted until earlier Monday and latest next week.

whatever....i am done.